Monday, October 13, 2014

A New Life


Press play then read.



If I ever needed a large dose of encouragement, it was after this weekend. For the last two weeks, I had been feeling relatively lonely and felt as if the only people I could relate to were Allie and Alissa. I was definitely struggling to love Tomsk and make time to spend with people. There was nothing especially difficult about this past weekend but I could tell that I was fed up with myself. I was fed up with the way that I had secluded myself and stopped reaching out to the people around me. I was fed up with how I was focusing all of my energy on myself and my life in America. I have felt as if I were doing nothing and everything all at once. We are teaching tons of English here in Russia and trying to learn a lot more Russian. I had been making everything about me. Even this paragraph revolved around me. 



Why am I so selfish?




Sometimes I think Satan feeds us lies and tries to get us to forget about the freedom, hope, and new life that we have in Jesus Christ. When I made the decision to follow in the footsteps of Jesus, have a relationship with God, and be led by the Holy Spirit, I died to my former life and entered into a life freedom. 

Galatians 2:20-21 says, "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.  I do not nullify the grace of God, for if righteousness were through the law, then Christ died for no purpose." 

I had to let that soak in for a moment. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. It is futile for me to be caught up in my own misfortunes and to keep running in circles in my mind over how selfish I am being. Dwelling on my selfishness is still selfish! Duh. It is pointless for me to seek ways to fix myself. My seemingly selfless actions are in vain when I am trying to gain satisfaction from what I am doing. Christ died for a purpose. His purpose is all of us. His grace is for all of us. It was only through Christ that my sinning flesh was put to death. It was only through Christ that I was made whole; in Christ, I am forgiven and made righteous. 

Yesterday, at church, we celebrated Thanksgiving. It was such a joy to take part in giving thanks and praise to a God who loves us. It didn't matter that we speak different languages. God hears each of our hearts and calls out to us. No matter our background or our language, Christ is all and in all. This thanksgiving came at just the right time. I am so thankful for this opportunity to be in Russia: to be teaching English, to be learning Russian, to be making new friends, to be mentored by people like Emil & Jenny, to be living with Allie & Alissa, to be attending a church that is focused on reaching the community, to be eating new foods, to be learning how to live selflessly, and to be gifted with the means to share my life in Christ with others. Mm, praise the Lord!



 

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